SHADOW. Pts. 1-4

As I tuned into my favorite radio (and internet) broadcast tonight the late Bill Pearce introduced one of thousands of taped audio programs he presented over the course of five decades.

“Divine Disability”

As Bill inferred in his broadcast, the title seems almost blasphemous. And yet, I have found it to be true in my own life.

While the particular personal example I have in mind is fairly mundane when stacked up against some of the other experiences to which I have been subjected in this life, it is the example I have in mind at the moment.

As I reflect on it now, I am suddenly amazed that the circumstance to which I allude here occurred at least thirty years ago.

I worked for United Parcel Service at the time, and every day before I returned to the center I pulled over and completed my paperwork. I can tell you it was July or August, and the temperature was approaching 100, as I navigated my truck to the side of the road, and threw open the package bulkhead, as well as the driver’s and passenger’s doors. My truck was facing south and at the end of a street leading out of a mobile home park.

I suppose I sat there fifteen or twenty minutes, and completed my delivery and pickup counts, and added my C.O.D.’s. Ultimately, I completed the job at hand, and put my delivery pad and cash envelope away.

At this juncture I turned the ignition key, put the package car into first gear, let out the clutch, and pressed on the accelerator. The vehicle crept forward, and suddenly there was a ‘bump bump.’

And I knew. I just knew.

I had run over a living thing. There could be no doubt about it since something had to have crawled up under the vehicle, after I pulled into that empty space by the road.

Pt. 2

I hesitated to discover whatever this ‘something’ was, but there was little choice. Hypothetically, I might have run over a child. With this, I stood up, negotiated the three metal steps which separated me from the asphalt, did a 90 degree turn, and spotted the creature.

A large German Shepherd lay in the ditch next to my delivery truck. It was apparent that my back tandem wheels had run over him as I pulled away. He lay there twitching, and in his last throes; having sustained the full weight of the 3-4 ton vehicle. Thankfully, his agony was over in a moment, and he lay still in death.

I can tell you, readers, I was mortified. You have to understand I don’t so much as like killing an insect, much less something as large as a German Shepherd. But it was what it was, and there was nothing I could do but attempt to discover his owner. As a result, I walked fifty feet to the nearest mobile home, knocked on the door, made the occupant aware of the situation, and asked whether he happened to know the identity of the dog’s owner. He didn’t.

Thus, I was forced to leave the poor animal where he lay with the assumption someone would retrieve a shovel from their utility room, and do the right thing by the pitiful creature. At this point, I glanced at the unfortunate creature, navigated the steps to my truck, sat down in the driver’s seat, turned the ignition key, and headed back to the UPS center. Of course, this was before the advent of cell phones, and it was only after I arrived at my workplace that I made my supervisor aware of the situation. He was understanding and told me that I’d done all I was expected to do.

Having often reflected on the sad memory, I have come to call the precious pooch, “Shadow” since it is apparent he crawled under my delivery vehicle in order to seek a respite from the summer sun. He could not have known it would be the worst choice he ever made.

But to return to my original thesis. The notion of Divine Disability. It seems, as with so many instances in our lives, that God could have done something to prevent the needless death of this magnificent animal, and the pain which I have realized as the result of having unintentionally taken its life.

Pt. 3

As a result, in any potentially good or bad or in between circumstances of our lives, and the end thereof, we are left with some interesting possibilities:

1.    God is Willing but Unable

2.    God is Able but Unwilling

3.    God is neither Willing nor Able

4.    God is both Willing and Able

Now obviously, our interpretation of what we deem to be either a good or bad outcome will naturally bias our persuasion, as to the previous possibilities of God’s good will or limitations.

Having lived a relatively long and (scripturally) informed life, however, I’m convinced that #1 and #3 are automatically ‘off the table,’ and cannot at any time be true; (given our Lord’s assurance that ‘with God all things are possible’). Thus we are left with the possibility that #2 and #4 possess some merit.

For example, Hebrews Chapter 11 characterizes victory after victory, as well as (seeming) defeat after defeat among God’s people. In regard to the negative aspects of this chapter, we read the following words:

³⁶ Some faced jeers and flogging, and even chains and imprisonment. ³⁷ They were put to death by stoning; they were sawed in two; they were killed by the sword. They went about in sheepskins and goatskins, destitute, persecuted and mistreated— ³⁸ the world was not worthy of them. They wandered in deserts and mountains, living in caves and in holes in the ground.

Thus, it is apparent that the second of the four options fits this passage quite well. In this scenario, God was able, but unwilling to aid His suffering people. (It’s no wonder this passage of scripture has not only been referred to as ‘The Faith Chapter,’ but as ‘The Chapter of the Martyrs’).

Pt. 4

Interestingly enough, in the New Testament Book of Acts, Chapter 12 we read a story that might have ended in a very similar manner, (but didn’t).

⁵ So Peter was kept in prison, but the church was earnestly praying to God for him.
⁶ The night before Herod was to bring him to trial, Peter was sleeping between two soldiers, bound with two chains, and sentries stood guard at the entrance. ⁷ Suddenly an angel of the Lord appeared and a light shone in the cell. He struck Peter on the side and woke him up. “Quick, get up!” he said, and the chains fell off Peter’s wrists.
⁸ Then the angel said to him, “Put on your clothes and sandals.” And Peter did so. “Wrap your cloak around you and follow me,” the angel told him. ⁹ Peter followed him out of the prison, but he had no idea that what the angel was doing was really happening; he thought he was seeing a vision. ¹⁰ They passed the first and second guards and came to the iron gate leading to the city. It opened for them by itself, and they went through it.

In this case, the fourth of the four options was the order of the day. God was not only willing, but He was also able.
Ultimately, for the believer, Providence guides our every circumstance and outcome. While we are commanded to pray, and communicate our needs to the Creator, there is no guarantee that He will answer us according to our personal persuasion of how He should respond; only that an answer will come. (Either Yes, or No, or Wait).
God is, at all times able, but He is not at all times willing. Ultimately, we must take solace in the verse,
“And we know that all things work together for good to them who love God…” (Romans 8:28)
Yes, I have often questioned God’s will, motives and outcomes, and I have often wondered why He allowed my series of personal providences to fall together as they have, but we can be assured that there will be enough answers in the life to come, and that He rewards those who love and diligently seek Him; even for a dearth of understanding.
And not one to ‘leave you hanging,’ in regard to my previous illustration, I, for one, am convinced that we will see our dearly departed pets again one day. And I have claimed one, in particular, for heaven; given the reality that I inadvertently contributed to his demise.

Rest in Peace, Shadow. I’ll see you on the other side.

By William McDonald, PhD. Excerpt from "(Mc)Donald's Daily Diary" Vol. 52. Copyright pending

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