“Can one observe the suffering of many
and believe that the suffering of one is of any less consequence?” (William McDonald, PhD. Quotation from a
recent dream).
My wife and I drove over to a nearby
town last night and ‘took in’ a movie. The name of the cinematic offing?
“The Shack”
Of course, this movie was based on a
well-known fictional book by the same title. However, based on the subject
matter, it certainly could have happened; most especially since the story
recounts a dream or vision a particular man experienced whilst in a coma.
Without going into the intricacies of
the entire movie, suffice it to say that during the experience the main
character found himself in a cottage with God, the Father, God, the Son, and
God, the Holy Spirit. Two of the three characters wore the countenance and
clothing of women, and one, (the Jesus character) that of a man.
During one scene ‘Mack’ asks God, the
Father,
“Why did you bring me here?”
To which the Almighty God of the ages
responds,
“Because this is where you got stuck!”
Where you got stuck, indeed. During
the course of my two and a half decades as a pastoral counselor I have often
shared similar words with my clients.
I have referred to that “this is where
you got stuck” moment as “The Genesis Effect.” For you see, I am convinced that
in so many cases “that which ails us” can be traced backwards in time to a
beginning; a beginning which represents a particular time and circumstance.
Pt. 2
Having ‘sat’ with literally thousands
of clients, I can tell you that among a score of significant issues which rank
highest on the list of “Genesis Effects” Unforgiveness may well come in at the
top of resulting responses to the original catalyst.
In the movie, “The Shack” our troubled
hero takes his adolescent son and daughter camping, and in the midst of their
adventure “Josh” and “Kate” set sail on a tranquil lake in a canoe; only to tip
over and come close to drowning. Having witnessed their awful dilemma their
father, “Mack” jumps into the water, and proceeds to swim to their rescue.
Sadly however, as he is in the midst of his valiant rescue a child predator
manages to kidnap, and subsequently assault and kill his younger daughter,
“Missy.” Ultimately, one of the three persons of the Godhead encourages Mack to
offer the predator forgiveness; though we never see the man, nor hear a plea
for forgiveness.
I was once watching a “60 Minutes”
broadcast on which a short piece of security footage was included in the main
story. We see a deputy sheriff and a prisoner, handcuffed together, exiting an
airplane and walking across the tarmac. As they enter the terminal building,
and begin walking down a hallway, suddenly a man standing next to a phone booth
drops the phone, steps up to the prisoner and fires a 38 revolver bullet point
blank into his head. As it falls together the suspected predator had been
returned to the local area to stand trial for child molestation and murder. The
man with the gun? The father of the unfortunate little girl. Faced with
remission or retribution, her father had chosen retribution. (And it costs him
dearly).
As the movie continues, the main
character rebels against the very thought of forgiveness, shakes his head in
abject disgust, and repeats, “No! No! No!”
At which time God reassures him,
“This isn’t about a relationship. This
is about relief. They are two very different things.”
Pt. 3
And yet. And yet…
There are some among us who refuse to
release that they might find relief.
What seems ironic to me is that many
of those who have previously offended us are either uncaring or unaware, (or
may have gone on to their reward) and yet we, the victims of their words and
actions, go on feeding and feeling hurt and bitterness; like it was a pet to be
stroked and pampered.
Please don’t mistake me. The act of
forgiveness is no slight undertaking. But it can be had and it can be done. And
as the character in “The Shack” discovered, it so often begins with three
words. (Hint. Two pronouns. 1 verb between the two).
And then there is a wonderful little
exercise that I highly recommend to my clients, (but which is best done in the
privacy of one’s own domicile).
Try it with me. Say it out loud.
“Bitterness (or Unforgiveness), you’ve
lived rent free in my spirit for far too long. NOW GET OUT!!!”
(Not only have these awful things
lived rent free within us, but they have, in essence, expected us to pay their
rent).
Pt. 4
I tell a story about several men who
are engaged in an African safari. As they walk down a jungle pathway, suddenly
the guide steps into a morass of quicksand. The other men become frantic and
throw him a couple of ropes. Strangely enough, though the guide is up to his
waist now, he tosses the ropes back. In spite of the efforts of his paid
customers the guide sinks deeper, and deeper, as if he is perfectly content to
disappear beneath the sucking mud. Ultimately, he does, and all that remains on
the surface are a few bubbles.
Well, in real life it’s apparent that
no one would do this, but in real life some of us do very much the same thing.
I have often wondered why when God
requires a plea for forgiveness in order to exercise it, He asks us to forgive
our enemies without any care, awareness, or request on their part. But the
answer to this question is not all that long coming.
Whereas, He always judges rightly,
requires obedience from those who hope to dwell with Him, and is not limited by
human emotions, He understands that with our extension of forgiveness to the
unknowing and/or undeserving we, as
victims, are joint beneficiaries with those who have brought us pain.
In the movie, “The Shack” the main
character, Mack, is adamant about his ongoing emotions, and exclaims,
“But I’m still angry.”
And with a knowing twinkle in His
eyes, (as the God character has now assumed a male persona) the Father
responds,
“And you may be for quite some time.
…But you MUST begin.”
by William McDonald, PhD. Copyright pending
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