THE CASPERS OF OUR LIVES. Pt. III. (a.k.a. Summoning Up Harry)

 

GHOSTING

We’re getting there. At least, in relation to this topic, we’re getting to where I want to take you.

If you spent some time with the previous segment of this article, you just finished reading a passage from the Old Testament in which King Saul summoned up the Prophet Samuel from the grave.
Well, my friends, the king was all too aware of the admonition in the Book of Leviticus.

“‘Do not turn to mediums or seek out spiritists, (nor attempt to interact with the dead). I am the LORD your God. (19:31)

Saul had willingly disobeyed the Almighty, and for this he would pay with his life.

Okay. Now we’re there there. 

Again, I don’t know if the creator of the word, ‘Ghosting’ thought it through in the way I have thought it through, but based on the prohibition in Leviticus and the story of King Saul, it has been helpful for me to consider those persons in my life, who have purposely stepped away from me, and without clarification as,

…dead.

It simply serves my purposes to think of them as 

…ghosts; 

(which makes a lot of sense when you consider they have already relegated you or me to past tense status).

You don’t socialize with ghosts. You don’t invite them into your house. You don’t cook them a meal. You don’t maintain communication with them.

…They’re DEAD!

Readers, I’m convinced that we all have to find our own way in regard to healing the wounds which result from the ‘dearly departed people’ in our lives; who have chosen to ‘ghost’ us. But this is how I deal with it.

I value and affirm the love and care we once enjoyed together

(but)

I consider them to be among the departed, and refuse to entertain any further thoughts about them or hold any more (figurative) séances with the ghosts of my past.

I refuse to summon up Harry.

Rest in Peace, Casper.

NOTES: A few disclaimers here

We all deal with our ‘ghosts’ in different ways. Some very successfully. Others not so much. I just happen to believe the manner I described, above is an especially viable way to address such persons and circumstances; when one has been ‘set aside’ with little or no explanation.

The course which I have detailed does not, in my mind, apply to those with whom you have amicably separated yourself, or vice versa, and maintain a distant, but tolerable relationship. 

One especially troublesome variable, in terms of this subject, is the presence of both Ex’s and minor children. Obviously, in such a case one is forced to maintain some connection and communication ‘til one’s offspring reach the age of maturity.

Finally, as Christian people we are confronted with the imperative of forgiveness; which, I believe, we are called to exercise 100 percent of the time, whether the ‘guilty party’ requests it, or doesn’t. If for no other reason than forgiveness is good for us.
Forgiveness, however, does not necessarily include the reestablishment or reinvestment of trust; now or in the future. 

Perhaps, in a minority of cases, it may be possible to bring one’s ‘ghost’ back to life. That is, occasionally reconciliation with the offending party becomes possible. Obviously, in such a case, one must make a decision whether it is safe or wise to put one’s vulnerability on the line, and risk the same outcome as before.


   By William McDonald, PhD. From (Mc)Donald's Daily Diary. Vol. 44. Copyright pending

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