At the same time there are those among us who will need
plenty of time to move through the stages that lead to emotional healing. I
have counseled clients who required weeks of therapy to move through the early
stages of the loss of a loved one; whether by divorce or death. The grieving
process is just that; a process. Tremendous patience and compassion is required
to adequately counsel such persons. At the same time, my skills have been
tested by clients who cannot consign a loved one to memory, and resume a
functional lifestyle. I think of one woman who continued to “hold out a candle”
for her divorced husband years after he remarried another woman.
Let’s consider some potential remedies to the emotion and disorder
we refer to as Depression.
Having spent well over a decade in the counseling arena, I
have concluded that there are at least four major intervention types which
contribute to healing: Counseling, Medication, Spirituality and an Action
Orientation on the part of the depressive individual.
The essence of struggle, and relapse. The potential that
some will experience Depression throughout life, but that the ability to cope
and not sacrifice ourselves to our Depression is paramount.
Beyond the initial requirement that we make that healing
Decision, we must move beyond theory into that rarified atmosphere called
Action.
(See Philippians 2:13)
In terms of Action Orientation, I often recommend a
particular assignment.
“FINERS” – Fun, Intimacy, Nutrition, Exercise, Rest and
Spirituality
(Elements which allow us to progress past Stuckness)
An Action Orientation often includes Betraying Your
Emotions. We are not required to “feel like it” to take positive action steps.
Such actions may include: Asking someone to forgive you,
Rectifying a past wrong, Including scripture and prayer in your daily regimen,
Letting go of harmful relationships, Listening to uplifting music, Taking
medicine that has proven beneficial to you, Changing negative behavioral
patterns, Successfully communicating your needs, Keeping journal entries,
Attending Counseling, Quoting scripture aloud, “Thought stopping, Involvement
in ministry, Goal-setting, Staying busy, etc.
Let me finalize our time together with the following
guidance for caregivers, friends and relatives of those who experience
depression.
Encourage the friend or relative to get help.
Don’t attempt to go it alone. Professional helpers may be
necessary.
Communicate. Allow the depressed party to express
themselves.
Don’t allow yourself to be manipulated by the depressed
person.
Don’t take threats for granted. Bring in appropriate
authorities if necessary.
Don’t tempt a depressive person.
Offer to participate in their counseling process, if
applicable.
Act as an accountability partner.
Participate in the activities a counselor may recommend to
your friend or relative. (As an example, offer to take daily walks with your
significant loved one.)
Make counselors and physicians aware of any serious changes
which occur in the demeanor of the patient.
Encourage the patient. Compliment the loved one for their
emotional progress.
Monitor medication, when possible.
Make wise decisions about your capability to maintain a
relationship or emotional intervention with the patient.
SUMMARY:
As I considered how to close this workshop, it occurred to
me to leave you with this information and admonition:
Recognize the Genesis or Source of Depression as The Beast.
Because it is. Granted it is more nebulous and less visible than its Symptoms,
but it is the more tangible of the two. It is when we discover The Source that
we can whip the Symptom.
When we discover and address The Sources of Depression that
we are closest to a miracle. That’s where our major focus should be. We may
have to do some emergency intervention in regard to the Symptoms that surround
Depression, but I find that when people get relief from its Sources, they most
often get the relief for which they have so diligently sought.
(By William McDonald, PhD. Excerpt from "Wednesday Night Teachings" Vol. 1)
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